In most cases the males are larger, however, this is a very young male, and older females. The female he grew up with is smaller than he is, but the other girls are at least 6 months older.
With my regular BN my males are 4" (if you go to the link below, the first picture is my alpha male of the regular BN) and my female is 3". When she isn't full of eggs, she is tiny. I sometimes get her mixed up with her older fry.
I use decorations I bought at PetSmart. One is an octopus, one has a snail and one had a snake wrapped around a stump (that's the one pictured in the link below). All are small, resin decorations, and I need to get larger pieces. My large regular BN is thinking about abandoning his "snail cave" (not a shell -- lost too many fish jammed in snail shells -- just a decoration with a snail on it) and thinking about using a bit of driftwood, but I think he feels exposed. The preferred deorations are hollow in the center with holes large enough for the fish to enter and exit, but not large enough for another fish to enter. At the top of the decorations is a hollowed out place where the fish keeps the eggs. When I bought these decorations, I didn't have BN, and so it is lucky accident that they really like these decorations. WHen I have some time, I will try to take a couple pictures.
Here's a question I posted on Planetcatfish, and in the second picture, when you scroll down, you can see the the albino male's tail hanging out of the "snake" cave. You can see where I point out where his eggs are in the cave. As you can see I had some major problems in the beginning, but I am doing okay now.
http://www.planetcatfish.com/forum/view ... =5&t=31278